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December 19, 2015

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Dollar Store Christmas

The house is still…I’m the only one awake at 6:15 on a Saturday morning and I’m flummoxed as to why I’m even awake, yet here I sit — taking in the quiet, the peace, the reflection.

Our stockings are hung carefully over the fireplace and the tree bears the fruit of ornaments that survived the Great Crash of 2015. It’s sparser now, but I’m endeared to it more. Now we have a story to tell every Christmas and can hoot and holler as we “Remember that time our gorgeous and enormous 8-foot tree fell and Paxton cried that Santa wouldn’t come anymore?” And Greg will do a (not so) hilarious impersonation of my reaction as it fell which will tickle the kids to no end, and then Jaana will pretend to slow-motion run to catch the tree like Greg did, and Paxton will pretend to spill his hot cocoa like Jaana did when the tree crashed just a foot and a half from her. And we’ll all have a good laugh at each other’s expense in the best possible way.

The nativity set includes shepherds whose heads have been superglued back onto their bodies and most of the animals were too busted up to keep. Sometimes Simon, our elf, hangs out in the crèche to be a part of the scene and sometimes a Storm Trooper battles the boy and the sheep. One of the wall hangings that boasts a deer in a winter scene came from the Dollar Store, as did the red mercury glass candle holder, some of the replacement ornaments and picture frames for the kids’ Santa pictures. My pine candle that smelled so good in the (not Dollar) store now gives off no scent at all, but I light it all day anyway, because that gentle flicker is calming in a way I don’t quite understand.

The train in the snow-covered Christmas village stopped circling years ago and now makes a clicking sound when we turn it on, and yet we always do because it lights up so prettily and the clicks become a part of the everyday chatter in the house. There are still no Christmas throw pillows or special Christmas dishes, despite resolutions annually that “I’m totally buying them this year no matter what.”

Yes…it’s all busted up and piece-mealed and not Pinterest-worthy in the least. But it’s home and it’s mine and just sitting here on a Saturday morning at 6:30 taking it all in fills my heart to overflowing. Another imperfect Christmas — just as they’ve all been since the first one 2,000 years ago.

I realize, on this quiet, reflective and peaceful morning, that’s exactly what makes my heart burst with joyful tears every morning as I gaze at our manger-ish living room. As I soak in all the imperfections we’ve collected from year-to-year, I see the not-so-catalog-worthy presentation…the amateurish hodge-podge passing as “decor,” and I realize I love it simply because it’s not perfect. It’s not at all how I would design it if I were starting from scratch with a Restoration Hardware catalog…and yet, is that not the entirety of the Christmas Story? Jesus — God Himself — came into a Dollar Store knock-off of a kingdom and dwelt among us. He came to fix his home, His tabernacle among us — not the perfect, the beautifully-presented or the worthy ones. He came to us — that Greek word being ego: He came to make His home amongst our egos and set us free from a Pottery Barn-perfect Christmas and life; to shatter the pride we get from a self-made and high-priced kingdom; to bestow on us peace and contentment in an imperfect presentation, available to all because He simply walked in and declared, It’s on the house. Bill paid in full.

Maybe today, you look around your house and notice your tree doesn’t look like it belongs in a store window, and your nativity has been replaced with Barbies and Superheroes and your flameless candles don’t flicker like they’re supposed to. Maybe today, instead of feeling less-than because it’s not perfect, you feel a kinship to Christ because His living room wasn’t perfect either. Maybe that candle that doesn’t smell still burns to remind you of the Light of the World, and you suddenly (finally?) understand why it’s so calming.

Maybe today, your heart begins to fill to overflowing because you realize the spirit of Christmas isn’t in the items themselves, but in the stories they carry, and how they all point you toward The Story of the season and all year through. Maybe today, you embrace your Dollar Store Christmas because you’re in good company — Jesus had one, too.

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Monica

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December 4, 2014

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BLOG, Giving thanks

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Thanksday #96

I’ve long neglected this space. Be started 14 months ago and has been my heartbeat (and rightfully so), but lately there has been a pull back to here — this place that’s just me, exploring and pondering and wondering — and I’ve found myself hopping back. Checking things out. Testing my fingers in these waters and enjoying the rush of cool and peace and home.

So I wrote something this week. And it felt awkward at first, and then familiar, and then like walking in the front door after a semester at college. This has always been, and always will be, the safe place I come home to.

There’s no place like home for the holidays, am I right?

As I typed out a status update on Facebook today, it brought to mind gratitude and thanksgiving and my heart again was pulled back here. After all, it is Thursday — Thanksday — and I got that wild urge to make me a thankful list.

(I also got that wild urge to forget to pick up my kids from school and just take off to The Big City for some shopping, but I thought this would be the more responsible thing to do.)

In no particular order, thankfuls for this week:

1. Christmas Blend Espresso Roast. It just might be what I look forward to the most every Christmas, but for some bizarre reason, they are only making half-pound bags right now, which makes me want to pull my hair out. Yes, I could just buy two, but I miss the big shiny bags with the fancy Christmas design. It doesn’t look as festive in an 8-oz size. (But it’s still delicious, don’t get me wrong.)

2. Pandora. All I play right now is my Frank Sinatra holidays station, and my car is a happy place full of the crooning of Frank, Ella, Dean, Sammy, Billie, Louie and others belting out Christmas favorites. My car is an even happier place when I’m be-bopping along with a Christmas Blend in my hand.

3. A Clean & Quiet House. I love being at home in the mornings, completely alone, in a house that’s decorated for Christmas and clean. Everything stays exactly where I leave it for those precious few hours, and there are no wrestling figures laying around, or shoes in my way, or crumbs trailing or PAW Patrol blaring. Sitting in peace and quiet and clean makes my heart so happy.

4. Mollie. Mollie is our three-year old Maltese we adopted at the beginning of the summer, and she is unquestionably the perfect dog for this family. She’s incredibly low-key, relaxed, chill, small, doesn’t shed, and the kids melt into puddles around her. Compared to Dogtastrophe of 2012 when psycho dog came into our lives briefly, not a day goes by that we don’t celebrate the chillness that is Molls. Even now, she’s just curled up into a ball on the white fuzzy blanket, and I can’t tell where she ends and the blanket begins. I love that. And I love my kids don’t walk around with high blood pressure and raised shoulders around her, unsure if she’ll snap or not. ‘Cuz not.

5. Breakfast Dates. For the first time in an embarrassing six months, Greg and I had a breakfast date this week. We used to do them weekly during the school year last year, but this year has been chaotic as I’ve done an extraordinary amount of traveling (which I am NOT complaining about and hey, Santa, bring me some more of that this year? Please and thanks.). But this week it made me remember with glee how much I love spending time with my husband. He is my most best BFF and honestly I’d rather hang out with him than anyone else on the planet. That was a fun omelet, and I’d like to do that again soon. (Please and thanks.)

6. The Dollar Store. Because wrapping paper, bows, ribbons and gift tags don’t come cheap, and I’m trying to save wherever possible.

7. Burt’s Bees Tinted Lip Balm in Red Dahlia. This stuff is my jam. I can’t stand lipstick anymore, and lip stains don’t work for me. But this stuff right here? It rocks my face off. It’s soft and creamy and just enough color to make it actually look like I have lips (somehow, as I’ve gotten older, they are blending into the color of my skin. What the??). I forgot to grab my tube of this one day while we were at Disney World, and when I mentioned out loud I needed chapstick, my amazing sister-in-law pulled out hers and said I could borrow some. IT WAS THIS EXACT LIP BALM. I died with joy, and I fell in love with her more, as if that were even possible. (Burt’s has other colors too, but this is the best, IMHO.)

8. Phone Dates. I had a (long overdue) phone chat with one of my BFFs from the Wessside this week, and it made my heart burst wide open and tears flood from my eyes realizing how much I miss my people out there. It was so wonderful to hear her voice and catch up properly on life happenings. While Facebook is great for keeping tabs on everyone, nothing compares to voice-to-voice conversation and shared laughter to the point of happy tears. (Well actually, nothing compares to doing that in person, but this is the next best thing.)

9. Wrapping Gifts. It is a completely love-hate relationship, gift wrapping. I love to do it — it’s cathartic and fun and I can sort of zone out while I do it — but I’m also a bit of a perfectionist about it (thanks, Mom! I love tape!). I’m trying a new thing this year — wrapping as I go — hoping that doing a little bit each day will make wrapping all fun instead of stressful. Or, if my family wants to send gifts pre-wrapped this year, that’s great too! (Hint, ahem, cough, grin.)

10. The Best Yes. Over at Be, we were able to have a wonderful conversation with Lysa TerKeurst about her latest book, The Best Yes. (You can listen to it here.) The entire book (and our interview with her about it) is about giving yourself permission to make the best decisions for yourself and your life (with God’s guidance, of course) and gracing yourself to let out a NO from time to time. It’s a game-changer, this one. And as we embark into one of the ~~busiest and stressful~~ most wonderful times of the year, the timing of this message is impeccable. I’m giving myself permission to give only best yeses this Christmas as well as from now on, and I’m excited about it.

Well lookie there. I just completed my first Thanksday in 10 months. That felt nice.

What about you? What’re some things you’re thankful for this week? (Or have you been thankful for in the past 10 months?) Leave a comment and share the gratitude! And I’ll see you ~~in another 10 months~~ soon!

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Monica

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December 4, 2013

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Devotions

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Have Yourself a Very Charlie Christmas

United Feature Syndicate Inc. / ABC

Watching it every Christmas became my religion.

My brother and I, snuggled up in feet-in-em pajamas on the couch, reciting every single line and laughing at the “loo loo loo’s” and big breath taken by all the kids at the last song – every nuance and every moment in the entire show warmed my heart.

Even now as a grown up with a mortgage and meals to cook and kids of my own, it’s my favorite Christmas show. We record it every year and watch it tens of times. We laugh at Snoopy and recite every line and still laugh at the “loo loo loo’s” and the big breath they collectively take during the last song.

A Charlie Brown Christmas.

A simple, sweet and heart-felt story of the true meaning of Christmas.

I watched it the other day with my littlest – snuggled in the big chair with the fuzzy blanket and his Elmo, heartily laughing as he got hiccups from laughing at Snoopy.

As I watched, I noticed the inconsistencies in the graphics. The changing colors of skin tones from frame to frame. The scaling of the Christmas tree changing from shot to shot. How the words “The Doctor is Real In” on Lucy’s booth is sometimes stacked and sometimes laid straight.

And I thought to myself, it’s not perfect. It’s not done with excellence. Second-by-second, frame-by-frame there are things that aren’t exact and aren’t perfect and sometimes look like it’s thrown together.

And as I watched the tradition of loving this show carry down to my littlest, I suddenly saw so clearly:

Where perfection and excellence are the battle cry of this day and age, this simple show from a simple time reminds me of an incredibly important truth –

When the heart is pure, imperfections don’t matter.

We love A Charlie Brown Christmas because it’s the only show that shares the true meaning of Christmas. Because it’s sweet and innocent and was created by one who wanted to show us The One.

And in it’s purity and innocence, Jesus overshadows the imperfections. Not only overshadows them, but makes them endearing. Beloved. Charming. Irresistible.

Noticing this was a revelation for me. I suddenly saw that in my desire to have a perfect Christmas, a perfect ministry, a perfect birthday celebration for my littlest – I forgot to focus on the heart behind it all.

I forgot that Jesus can fill the gaps of a comment form that doesn’t show up the way I want it to on a website. I forgot He can overshadow the imperfection of a missing picture in a brochure. I forgot He can make sound quality problems charming on a podcast. I forgot it’s not how the invitations get sent out, as long as people are invited.

I forgot.

I focused so much on the imperfection itself that I lost sight of Jesus in all of it.

And watching Charlie Brown with my own little Linus reminded me to stop being such a blockhead.

As we enter into this Christmas season, let’s remember to truly prepare Him room. Let’s prepare Him so much room that our imperfections, inconsistencies and weaknesses are lost in the shadow of Him. Let’s prepare Him so much room that our hearts have to grow three times their size.

Let’s focus on the why instead of the what.

Let’s take our little, imperfect and bare trees and allow Him to be seen through them.

That’s the true meaning of Christmas, Charlie Brown.

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Monica

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December 6, 2012

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Uncategorized, Writing

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So Here’s the Deal…

Decking the kids’ halls

…it’s looking like I’m taking off the month of December from writing.

Forget about decking my halls and decorating for Christmas and shopping and ordering and wrapping and shipping. And forget about parties and yule tide and open fires with roasting chestnuts. (Although, yes..that’s plenty.) And forget about stomach bugs and sore throats and a family who is cycling this stuff around like it’s a free pancake breakfast (I have no idea what that means) and leaving a less-than-stellar energy level in it’s wake. (Although, yes…that’s plenty too.)

But if you don’t forget all that…and you also add in work…for a church (where evidently, Christmas is sort of a big deal), and then you mix it all up in a pot, it smells less like mulled cider and more like crazy soup.

So instead of stressing myself out about posts, I’m giving myself permission to take a breather and just set the blog aside for a couple short weeks. And if I feel like writing something…then hey, bonus! And if I don’t, y’all extend the candy cane of grace and read older posts for auld lang syne.

(Did I just use that the right way?)

I pray you have the Merriest of Christmases…the Happiest of New Years…and a most blessed season celebrating the birth of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. May His peace fall upon you in droves as you serve and give and be His hands and feet to others around you this season.

I love ya. It’s true.

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Monica

Posted on

November 27, 2012

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Randomness, Uncategorized

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Lysol, Take Me Away (A Thought Collective)

Thoughts for today, in no particular order of unimportance:

1. I’m sick of the sick. Jaana had a stomach bug and then Paxton got a cold and cough. Then he caught the stomach bug and I thought it was over, then he threw up again 36 hours afterwards. Now Greg has a chest cold and if I were you, I’d buy up a bunch of Lysol stock because their sales have tripled over the last week, at least at my local grocery store.

I’m just praying, praying I don’t catch anything because if Mama goes down, everyone goes down. I’ll have to summons up Gamma to these mountains for reinforcement.

2. Why is it that every single afternoon around 12, I find myself desperately wanting a cup of coffee, but never actually stop to make one? And then next thing I know it’s after 4 and now it’s too late to have coffee because I don’t want to be up all night long because I love to sleep? Why don’t I just make the stinking coffee??

3. I spent all day yesterday being entirely too productive for a Monday. I washed all the bedding in the house, plus an additional couple of loads. I cleaned out the kids rooms and playroom, which equaled a large bag of trash, PLUS an entire carload of toys to donate. The clean should last approximately 47.3 minutes.

4. I’m going to the SEC championship game on Saturday night, and am therefore trying to find an outfit that is red and black, and also equal parts comfortable and cute. Which is a lot more difficult than you might imagine.

5. I want to do a Bible Study, a personal one, but just can’t figure out where to start. Ideas??

6. Guess what I just did? Right this second? Made myself a cup of coffee.

7. We spent Thanksgiving in The Big City and if I spend more than two days there I really miss the laid-back-chillness of the mountains. But what I did love was driving over 40 mph and on straight roads.

8. I made mashed potatoes and a gluten-free pecan pies for the Thanksgiving Extravaganza of 2012. But my mother-in-law doesn’t have a rolling pin or a potato peeler. So I had to go all old-school-like and peel potatoes with a knife and roll out the pie crust with a water bottle. (Guess what Gamma’s getting in her stocking this year?)

9. Can we revisit #8 for a second and just meditate on the fact that I actually made something that required rolling of the crust?

PAUSE.

10. “Throw the words ‘Salted Caramel’ onto anything and I’ll take it,” she sighs as she sips her freshly-made coffee sweetened with Salted Caramel Mocha creamer.

What’s new with you?